Kindness is an Act of Love

This world is becoming so messy, too much hatred and violence around. Danger is so unwelcomed yet so unbelievably close and real. If we allow ourselves we will sink in the gloom around. I was thinking yesterday about how beautiful this country is, how warm people are and how everyone smiles to you despite all. It is sad to see people confused and uncertain.

How do I get my mind distracted and find light in its compartments. Pictures are so powerful, they remind us of situations and people. They retrieve our feelings about them and make us think deeply. Pick the happy ones, if you are looking for happy thoughts. I am thinking of the many acts of kindness and love I am showered with - small things but real, simple and sincere.

I am thinking of those today and the people involved; and that’s my way to stay positive. May be it can inspire others too. No tags. People know themselves….

I replied that I was fine, but they call me an hour later to check I “sound” fine.

Just a little precious time left before they have to be at the airport heading home, they make the time to stop at my favorite “life is good” store to pick that shirt I once said I liked.

They heard the story a hundred times, as boring as it may sound, they remain as patient and concerned as the first time I tell it.

I am out of town, living in my bubble; they call me from the heart of the square so I would hear the crowds cheering, as they “know” I would have wanted to be there.

They write an article on new beginnings, and make reference to the friend in me who crossed their mind.

Despite a very short encounter with them and rare communication, they remember one thing they cherish about that encounter and try to remind me of.

They tell me they miss me and they show it in simple ways to leave no doubt it is true.

On a random day, no special occasion at all, they give me a call because they want to hear my voice.

I find them liking a picture of me, which I posted many years ago.

They call me by that special nickname they made up and they know it will put a smile on my face.

On my birthday, though many miles away, they wrap sunshine in a box and sent it my way. Before I opened the box, I knew exactly who it would be from.

They had enough level of comfort with me to give me their hair cream and cooking pan as they moved on to another country.

I find myself thinking of them every time I crave sushi, ice cream or have a walk.

They retweet, quote and favour my random thoughts and heartfelt sayings.

Remembering memories of things we did together and smiling with so much joy wishing we can bring back that time when the small things mattered.

We share the same passion for extra hot, caramel latte and would be very unhappy if it were otherwise

We may not speak, meet, or connect for a long time but I know the minute, I need guidance they will generously be happy to provide.

They share a poem or a song they know I would like.

The first email from their new inbox lands in mine.

A bunch of flowers to brighten my day is their special way of showing they care.

A long drive with endless conversations, loud music and the sound of two travel companions singing along at the top of their lungs.

They forgive my butterfly obsession and encourage it to grow.

They enjoy swimming with me on Saturdays and cherish it as a ritual.

Their strengths and resilience in difficult times, is an inspiration of mine when hard times call.

I miss the sound of their laughter.

The way we pick up where we left, like I saw them yesterday even though it has been quite some time.

Their morning text message every day for years.

They may be be young, and inexperienced yet their natural wisdom is invaluable.

The way I feel at home in their home, any time, every time and all the time.

And the list goes on……

“Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love”

To last forever

Fill it with deep understanding
Let it be true and undemanding

And it will last for ever

Build high walls of dreams around it
Let it be secured and defended

And it will last for ever

Forgive the ups and downs
Love the smiles and frowns

And it will last for ever

Listen, contain, care
Give, take and share

And it will last for ever


Wessam El Beih
Copyright ©2007

Close Friend

A close friend is like the sky
No matter how far, I will see
And in the darkness I look up high
Its guiding stars will shine on me

In time of need the sky will know
What to send down my way
It may be rain, it may be snow
It may be sunshine through my day

When it's cold, the sky will vow
A sunny day is sure to follow
When I am lost, some how
its warmth sweeps away the sorrow

A close friend is like the wind
Carries me above the highest cloud
And gently my friend will find
A time to bring my feet to ground



Copyright ©2008 Wessam El Beih

On My Thirty-Nine Birthday

On my thirty- nine birthday, I prepare to witness the last year of this decade and I write this note as a gift to myself. My gift is to remind myself that life is what we make of it and that a fully meaningful and authentic life is what I am determined to live. I am alright with disclosing my age and take pride in challenging those who say women usually won’t. I know my childhood friends won’t mind me doing that so much.

It matters to me what font I type my words and I realized that I have to like how the words look to me with the first few words, not at the end of what I write. The core lesson I remind myself of is that “what matters to me, is important”; how I see the world and my comfort with what I say or do is what I will not compromise. I am content with my life; with many wonderful people to cherish, things to be proud of and I feel I am on a purposeful path in this world.

Sitting here on my couch with the break of the morning, trying to let my thoughts flow without an agenda, and hoping it will some how make some sense at the end. I have committed to writing three morning pages each day to unlock my creativity. A complete flow of words that I do not read again is what I originally signed up for. It is so hard, I have to confess. For those who seek perfection, which I realize does not exist, but we seek it any ways it is hard. It is even harder to stop that voice in the head that speaks up so loud wanting to make a statement on every occasion. Writing from my heart was easier when I was younger and even more unpolished. Now I have professionally been trained by life to let my head interfere and sensor what I write. Not good. That voice speaks all the time, haunting me even in my dreams. Heart speaks more sincerely and without reservations if you unleash it. Head interferes to politicize your inner most emotions. What a muddle?

How beautiful it is to just “be” and let life do its job of being. How very natural to let yourself become part of the world around you and give yourself completely. How very hard for those who do so. In this moment when I am just flowing inside out, am aware of my self and surroundings. I hear the background singing of early rising birds and the farther work of an engine. I see the curtains of my window move gracefully with the slow breeze and I can feel the grin on my lips as I type those words. But, here I go again, that voice in my head is loudening again objecting to the flow of words from my heart. Demanding me to get real, get to the point, stay focused and make sense. What if I just not make sense to any one, but make sense to me. Would that be too hard to handle? A million buts that awful, nosy, voice of so called reason flags at me to keep me from my dreams.

I close my eyes and imagine myself by the sea hearing its waves so strongly and allowing it to move my inner storms and settle my inner winds. I think of running there whenever I feel I need a louder voice than reason. It is hot and humid and I can’t drink that hot coffee next to my reach. May be I can move away; go out on the terrace, be more in touch with the beauty around and cultivate the beauty I see within. May be I can. It is not beyond my reach.

Friday 1 July 2011

The Selected Few of the Crowd

Lay back and think about that sunny day
With a vast crowd that piled along the way
Lay back, recall how it feels
Not at ease, singeing your heels
When that cloudy sky came to my stare
Too soon before I could prepare
Lay back, recall the crowd dispersed in haste
Feeling breathless, at vain, and in waste
I never want to be in that place again
Where I cannot withstand such pain
Lay back and think of the selected few
All along the way right before you
They’d rather die
Than to ever make you cry
The faulty fail to spot what’s true
And misses on the selected few
Lay back, let it settle, recall your deed
A selected few of the crowd are all you need

Wessam El Beih, July 2010

An Empty Seat

On the day, when everything was finally crystallized, I could see clearly. In a big theatre, with many seats as far as my eyes could behold. It was my biggest and most important performance. My eyes kept screening the audience looking for some particular faces. I felt, if I turn at any point and my sight meets them that I might gain strength; and bring out the best in me.

Many people walked in and out. The theatre was getting filled up quickly. I had to intervene. I reserved the first few rows and marked them. The first was core and essential. The second was close but non essential; and the third, was familiar. Everyone else was freely seated.

It was nice to feel the room warming up. My eyes glanced the crowds and it boosted my morale. When the lights were still on, everyone was busy doing something. Some were getting to know each other, some were checking their phones and others were walking in and out of the theatre. A few were looking at me, I suspect waiting for me to start.

Suddenly the lights started dimming and I was getting ready. The music went up and I took up my role. At times I felt engagement in the room. Sometimes I felt alone. I called a few to come up on stage and dance with me; a few I encouraged to sing along. I could feel the spirit in the room but I couldn’t see the crowds anymore. I could only tell by looking at the people in the front. My eyes would not sway. They were the source of my strength; particularly those occupying the first row. When I would feel uncertain, I would look there. A smile, a nod or even that the seats were still warmed, would help me know that I was doing alright. I thought it would be vital to my performance that I have those who touched my core and those meant the most right before my eyes. A handful, were backstage. I found out later that it was more important for them to see how well I perform than to be at the front.

It didn’t matter much, that I lost some people at the end of the theatre. I am sure they had other things to do. It mattered when someone in the front seemed distracted but it didn’t always break my heart. It's only when my eyes fell on an empty seat on the first row, that my heart pounded so heavily. My eyes wandered searching in the crowds and I felt I was losing my focus. Swiftly, I said to myself, it must have been important that they had to walk out. But my heart was questioning, how important it was. I wondered if it was more important to them to leave, than it was for me to have them there. I don’t know why I kept noticing that one seat throughout. Whenever I looked and found it was empty, it affected my performance. The room was full. The first few rows had many important people. But that one seat kept getting empty. In a vivid recall of the past, that one seat I always had reserved. It was occupied shortly and left cold on many occasions. Don’t know why I kept reserving it, despite expecting it to be empty. I went out of tune a few times. I got back on track later.

On that day I learned a few lessons. The first: an empty seat on the first row would always be a disappointment. Reserve it for those who won’t let you down. Don’t keep a seat on the first row for someone who doesn’t show up or has previously walked out on you. The second: people won’t generally decline a free good invitation. They may not value it as much, but a free invitation on a first raw seat is tempting. They would welcome it if they have nothing better to do or someone of more interest to be around. Make sure who is there to bring the best in you, enjoy being around you and is there for you; and who is there just because it is a convenience. The third: welcome any one to your theatre at any time, they can be freely seated. This gives them freedom to walk in and out as they wish, provided they don’t disrupt your performance and discomfort you. You won’t really notice them in the crowd. Lastly: backstage is essential. You may not see the people there, or notice their role often. Be attentive to backstage though. You dont only perform well because of those before you; but also because there are people, you don’t notice who are watching over you. Some of those are more worthy of being in that empty seat.

Asmaa, shows you how to “Let your dreams be bigger than your fears”….

Staring at the window and gazing into the gardens on the other side; reflecting on the past year with all its potentials, opportunities and challenges. I find myself smiling to the abstract and thinking of “her” with her smiling face for I have never once seen her frown upon her misery or lament her pains. I remember “her” with a sigh of relief and a wishful belief that she is looking down upon us with her comforting smile, patting on our shoulders without a word. I find tears coming to my eyes; happy tears that make you content.

Do you know what it is like when you have waited for someone for so long and finally meet them? All the waiting, longing and anticipation; suddenly relieved by the moment you glance their sight. Feelings of relief, a climax and happiness gush right into your soul. A first time expecting parent will surely relate to that; wanting to cross the path of time anticipating the baby. Every passing day, the anticipation peaks and the expectations rise. With every felt kick and every heart beat heard, a bond grows. You fall in love with this unfamiliar person to you and wait to meet impatiently. You wonder about a million things and have growing hopes and sincere prayers to bring to the world, someone who makes a difference, makes you proud in doing so and help you be a better person yourself. Imagine the moment this person comes to the world. Imagine the first time you lay your eyes on a healthy, beautiful and happy person. Suddenly, every moment that passed by in anticipation counts, every pain felt was worth it and every burden was meaningfully replaced by joy and pride. This person’s name is “Asmaa”, a lucky baby for she has numerous parents.

This is my heartfelt note of gratitude and a statement of what she means to me. I personalize her because she is personal to me. Asmaa is the long awaited friend, after years of parting. She is that beautiful someone who has come to the world to make a difference, to make you proud in doing so and to help you be a better person yourself. She means so many things to many people, I am sure. This is what she means to me.

If anyone turns to you asking for help, would you find it in your heart to deny them help? And if you do turn them away for whatever reason, how would you feel? The power to help another is a way we help our own souls. Sometimes helping others is not solely an act of kindness that you voluntarily offer, it is for some of us an obligation. The woman with the smiling face, and so are many others like her, was denied help. She was denied help by people whose obligation was to help her. She passed away because of that; leaving behind her three youngsters all by themselves in this world. Despite striving to help her, together with many others, we failed to get her the help she needed in time. It was personal to me that I have tried so hard and it was personal to me that I have failed to save her life. That thought never left my mind. The thought of someone losing their life because of another person failing on their obligations was intolerable. The thought of three youngsters, the eldest was sixteen years old left all by themselves in the world was intolerable. The thought of relenting to “I did all I can” was intolerable. Her smiling face never left my mind. After many years, Asmaa has fulfilled an obligation due to a woman which was not fulfilled to her in real life.

She brings to my heart a lot of hope that many other lives who have the right to be saved; will actually be saved. She brings hope that every person would realize the power within their own souls and find it their responsibility to stand up for their rights relentlessly. She equally stands as a firm reminder to everyone out there failing on their commitments, their duties, and their obligations. With her fierce gentleness she looks you in the eye and speaks to your conscience that your words, your actions, your beliefs could and would affect someone else’s life. Would you deny someone help if their lives depended on you? Think again. Think hard.And think over again. Asmaa will help change our world; I believe it with all my heart.

Asmaa to me is the teacher who, over six years of her evolution, has practically preached about what genuine commitment really means. No one is paid for commitment or passion. I have known some who are blessed by it, ignite it within their souls and maintain it to drive them. I was once told “passion begets passion”. She has powerfully drawn and multiplied collective eagerness, commitment, passion, tenacity and belief. Asmaa is an example of all that and is on a mission to snowball that. There can never be too much passion or too much commitment. Either there is or there isn’t. I would swear that there is.

True citizenship in not where you have been born, without your choice. It is where you have chosen to live and bond; building a sense of ownership to the people and the land identifying with many aspects that bring you closer. Asmaa, born in the era of the glorious Tunisian and Egyptian revolutions, is an unintended magical sign of resilience and a symbol to revolutionize our spirits to bring about more compassion, empathy and fairness to this world. A beautiful Tunisian, bonding with an Egyptian spirit to highlight that true citizenship is a choice that can be stronger than unprivileged born citizenship.

Someone stated that at some point in our lives and in one way or another we are all Asmaa. I believe so too. For a while, we may forget that despite our challenges, we are powerful. Asmaa was held back by her own fears and was on the verge of giving in. We all do sometimes. She realized that her love for life and her responsibility towards herself is the foundation to discover the power within and step over her fears. As a feminist and a development worker, I cannot overlook the powerful example that Asmaa sets for every woman. It brings to my heart a lot of pride that this example comes from a region where women still struggle for equality. Despite tremendous talent, demonstrated achievements and unquestionable potential, there are those who still strive to keep women in the shadow. Especially after the revolution, it is controversial to tolerate the regression to the space for women issues; every woman is Asmaa.Look to the Asmaa in you; in her potential, in her strength of spirit, love for life, persistence to make a difference and in the power to bring about equity and fairness to this world. Asmaa is a proclamation about the power within each and every one of us; unacceptable to overlook or oppress. Asmaa opens the door to many people to speak up, to live strong and live well. It is up to us to walk through that door or to choose to remain locked in.

The power of believing in oneself is also coupled by the power to believe in others. Six years ago, at the inception of a movie idea, the search for a famous and seasoned writer to tell the story was the direction set forth. At that time, Khaled Abol Naga suggested Amr Salama, saying to me “mark my words; he will be a rising star”. He was right. Overtime, strong belief kept materializing and transferring to everyone who was associated. Many times, the idea could have been placed on hold or waived indefinitely. It is because of a strong belief that Asmaa was realized; a strong belief in the power to relief another person's suffering, to make a difference and the responsibility towards what you believe in. Asmaa is a mesage that if you truly believe, you can be visionary and can realize any dream.

The future of this country and the region will be shaped by young people. They may not be seasoned by experience, but are determined to develop it. Young people are malleable to new ideas. They are willing to change to realize their dreams and are adamant for success. Asmaa is a signature to the power and talent of youth. She is a testimony to take risks; young talented people will make it happen.

Asmaa is the proof of the transformation that can happen to a person, reshape who they are and the way to view life. I believe that every single person who was engaged in the birth of Asmaa has been touched by her existence. I believe this transformation is irreversible and will remain forever in many future events. I believe that every single person who meets (watches) Asmaa will be positively affected, and will reflect deeply on the meaning of living. I believe that the story well told, well presented and well communicated is so hard to detach from. There is a bond that develops between you and Asmaa as strong as you choose it to be. You will relate to Asmaa in many ways. I believe, “She” will change you, and through you will change the world.

My last words are words of truly heartfelt gratitude. Thank you Amr Salama for the inspiration you have brought to my life through your creativity, your honestly and your sincere determination. Thank you Hend Sabry for identifying with Asmaa and adding to her beautiful everlasting smile your genuine, warm talent and personality. Thank you Maged El Kodwany for demonstrating to us that one can alter and be altered if we believe in the power we have within. Thank you, Mohamed Hefzy and Bushra for taking a risk and making your resources work for a cause- that will surely payback on many fronts. Thank you Hany Adel for the music which shivers me each time and fills me with hope and regenerates my energy. Thank you to every person who parented Asmaa and nurtured her to grow into this beautiful and prosperous woman.

Asmaa is the person I want to be to holding on to what I believe, overcoming my fear and stepping beyond what holds me back to reach my dreams. Thank you Asmaa, for making a difference, making us proud in doing so and help us be better people. Thank you for opening the door to change our world.

Wessam El Beih, Janury 8th 2011